Friend or Foe? …

During the American Revolution, soldiers encountering other soldiers at night would call out "Friend or foe?" to the other party in order to identify them and discern their intentions. Hearing that call meant that you had better reply quickly and properly or expect a volley of musketfire to be sent your direction.

Since weightloss is a constant battle, the analogy is appropriate here as well. In the battle of the bulge, the "friend or foe" call should be used early and often.

Let's take a moment to define "friend" and "foe."

First of all, a friend is one who is aware of your struggle and takes steps to support you in your endeavors. A friend can either be someone who is a partner in your weight loss / fat loss struggle, or one who is supportive of it. In either case the "friend" will help with accountability, over the long and short runs.

The friend will encourage you to choose the low fat, low calorie items at home and away. The friend will steer away from his favorite buffet and instead head to a restaurant that serves reasonable portions of healthy food. A friend will hide the dessert, put away the holiday candy bowl, and instead offer fresh fruit or a nice veggie platter.

The friend will serve as a "pick me up" when you are down. A friend understands that yours is an emotional struggle as well as a physical one, and that a simple word of encouragement can prevent a major back-tracking event from occurring.

A friend will call you to go workout together, will purposely park the car an extra hundred yards from your destination on a hot day, and will suggest that you both take the stairs instead to get some exercise. A friend knows that some fresh air and sunshine is the "pick me up" you need, even when ice cream may be the "pick me up" you want. He or she will make sure you get what you need.

A friend will help you to grow, mature and extend yourself beyond your own belief, but not beyond your ability. A friend is the only type you can surround yourself with in order to be successful in your fight.

On the other hand, a foe is someone who undermines all of the hard work you put towards creating new habits and breaking old ones. A foe is outwardly "for you" but inwardly "against you."

A foe will invite you to the movies knowing full well that it's your day or time to go to the gym. A foe will celebrate minor holidays (like Arbor Day) with cake and cookies, even when he's not such a big fan of trees.

A foe will coddle you as though you are an infant. A foe will tell you to not push yourself so hard, as you might hurt yourself. A foe will make things as easy as possible for you.

A foe will point out the futility of your fight. He will mention "genetics", "big bones", and "heredity", while "overcome", "victory", "change" and "breaking the cycle" are not in his vocabulary.

A foe must be avoided at all costs. A foe is your greatest enemy in the battle of the bulge.

Take a moment and list the names of those closest to you. Mark them as either "friends" or "foes". If at all possible, avoid the foes. If "foes" must be in your life, be aware of their tactics. Make it very clear to them that the choices you make are all directed toward creating a healthier you. Tell them that you will be victorious.

Ironically, the battle of the bulge is one that can be won alone, and lost with "help" ...

Article by Michael Callen © 2005 All Rights Reserved

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